Who Am I Becoming?

Recently, my oldest daughter randomly asked me if I was OK. She said that I seemed “off.” I assured her that I was fine—maybe just still recovering from being sick. At the time, I didn’t think much of it. But later, it hit me: a change was happening in me, and others could see it, even when I couldn’t.

My daughter, who knows me so well, noticed the shift in my demeanor—my facial expressions, my energy, my responses to conversations. To her, something was really off. But to me, I was just physically sick. What I didn’t realize was that I was spiritually and emotionally sick too.

Lately, I’ve been spending a lot of time on social media and the news. At first, it seemed harmless—just staying informed, scrolling through updates. But little by little, it began to consume my thoughts, shape my emotions, and alter my perspective. Without realizing it, I was being influenced in ways I never intended. The negativity, the comparisons, the endless stream of information—it was all affecting me. It wasn’t a sickness in my body, though that might have also been a contributing factor; it was the sickness in my soul.

Sometimes, we don’t even see it.  It’s like a festering wound we ignore until it becomes so big, so undeniable, that we’re forced to deal with it. When we finally recognize the change within us, we’re left asking: Who am I? What have I become? But the better question is: God, who do You say I am?

Scripture Readings:

📖 2 Corinthians 5:17 – “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”

📖 Psalm 139:23-24 – “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

📖 Romans 12:2 – “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

📖 Isaiah 43:18-19 – “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”

Reflection:

Life has a way of pulling us down rabbit holes—searching, questioning, chasing answers—only to leave us feeling more lost than found. When we finally pause to reflect, we may not even recognize the person staring back at us.

Like the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32), we may wake up one day and realize we have strayed so far from where we intended to be that we don’t even recognize ourselves.  It’s never too late.  But just as the father in that parable ran to embrace his lost son, God is ready to welcome us back with open arms.

So, ask yourself: What am I really seeking? Is it truth? Fulfillment? Peace?

More importantly, am I seeking it in God—or in things that will never satisfy?

Application:

1. Self-Examination – Take time to honestly assess where you are in life. Are you moving closer to God or further away?

2. Prayer for Renewal – Ask God to help you rediscover who you are in Him and to realign your heart with His purpose.

3. Scripture Reflection – Meditate on God’s promises about your identity in Christ. Write them down and speak them over yourself daily.

4. Accountability & Community – Talk to a trusted friend, mentor, or pastor about what you’re experiencing. We aren’t meant to navigate our faith alone.

5. Action Step – If there are areas in your life where you’ve strayed, take one intentional step back toward God today. That could be through prayer, fasting, worship, or simply surrendering your need for control.

Closing Prayer:

Father, I feel lost. I’ve gone down so many paths seeking answers, yet I still feel empty. When I look in the mirror, I don’t recognize who I’ve become. But You see me, You know me, and You call me Your own. Lord, renew my mind, transform my heart, and guide me back to You. Help me release what is not from You and embrace who You have created me to be. I trust that You are making all things new. In Jesus’ name, Amen.